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Monday, February 8, 2010

Random Wednesday By Gizmola

Some "concerned" commenters have wondered if the boys and I do anything outside the house. All the time! Today I'll explain some of our outdoor activities we like to do.

Dumpster Diving


This is our favorite and can be done right behind our apartment building so I can leave the baby asleep on my bed while the older two boys and I do this. I usually dangle one of them over the side to look for some new treasure. We've found half a bulletin board (now in the kitchen where I keep my grocery list of lard, tube meat, stevia and pumpkins), a shoe (which is good for Daniel since he already walks with a limp - now he doesn't! and we didn't have to go to a money loving, evil, conspiracy minded doctor to fix it), an unopened bag of marshmallows (which Bobby opened and started eating while dangling upside down. I took him out, made him throw it up right then and there), a clock with one hand (which is good because two handed clocks confuse Dan), and congealed grease which I can take home, reheat in the crockpot and use to deep fry the hot pockets I make for Dan.

Climb the Pole

Dumpster DivingThis is our favorite and can be done right behind our apartment building so I can leave the baby asleep on my bed while the older two boys and I do this. I usually dangle one of them over the side to look for some new treasure. We've found half a bulletin board (now in the kitchen where I keep my grocery list of lard, tube meat, stevia and pumpkins), a shoe (which is good for Daniel since he already walks with a limp - now he doesn't! and we didn't have to go to a money loving, evil, conspiracy minded doctor to fix it), an unopened bag of marshmallows (which Bobby opened and started eating while dangling upside down. I took him out, made him throw it up right then and there), a clock with one hand (which is good because two handed clocks confuse Dan), and congealed grease which I can take home, reheat in the crockpot and use to deep fry the hot pockets I make for Dan.

Herb Collection

We firmly believe in eating natural foods only. That's why my children will never eat a Twinkie, a bowl of Fruit Loops, ice cream, lean meat, unfermented veggies or real butter instead of lard. Because we also believe in being frugal, we don't buy fresh herbs at the grocery and I'm almost out of the dried out herbs I can pound into powder again. So we usually take a nature hike along the interstate and pick up anything that looks like it could be an herb to take home. Sometimes we dig it out of the ground with our bare hands to repot at home to grow more! The kids love this because they love cars and only once or twice have they been hit. Usually I take them home where they can sleep it off. I drag Thomas in his car seat behind me - he thinks it's a game!

Nutritional Education

I don't think it's ever too early to start homeschooling your children. One area that I'm determined to educate them in is making sure they are able to make healthy choices about food. I worry because Dan will get mad about not having Mountain Dew or what he calls "real" hot pockets so I don't want his attitude to rub off on the kids. So I take them outside McDonald's, Burger King, Taco Bell and point at the food the people are eating and tell them how it's full of bad biotics, GMO foods and isn't natural. We don't do this often because the boys get so upset about what horrible kinds of foods these people are eating that they start screaming and crying and trying to run into the restuarant to stop them.

How do you spend your family time outside?

4 comments:

  1. "...a clock with one hand..."

    This is brilliant. My favorite is the "Why is My Husband So Stupid?" post. You really have her tone down so well, it's scary.

    This Fundie Fiction has to be as good as Dna's Star Trec Fan Lit.

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  2. Dude! Awe-some! Seriously.

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  3. OMG, your posts just get funnier, my sides are hurting from laughing so hard. Thanks!

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