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TO READ THE DAILY DRIVEL, Although she says it will no longer be daily, and only about once a week...

http://emilysbellybutton.blogspot.com/


Monday, March 1, 2010

Emily's Explanation

There has been some questions and speculation about why I took down my blog. It’s very simple: the FBI suggested that I take it down in order to redesign and rename it so that those attempting to destroy me will not have fodder for their reign of terror. I will be back and better under a new name: Frugal Fruitloop Tips by Emily.


In the meantime, I will have time to catch up on my projects and further our PLAN. Things I will be doing include:

Cooking

I will be honing my cooking skills by trying new and diverse recipes. I have a recipe for gloodle pie. I will make a gloodle dough, put it in the crockpot to rise and then fill it with tube meat and four year old spices. I will then put another layer of soaked grain gloodle dough on top and brush it with whey. Once it is doughy I will serve it to my family with a 1/8 of spaghetti squash. Total cost: $0.75.

Crafting

Since my homemade fabric hammock was such a hit, I will show how you can use men’s underwear stapled to the wall in order to make a handy toothbrush holder. I will also show how you can hang desk lamps from the ceiling with a collection of your husband’s stuffed animals to make a festive light when your regular light is broken and you don’t want your landlord to see the hovel you live in. We will also staple cardboard to the wall for a fun, homemade chalk board.

Organization

This will be a wonderful use of my time so that I can share new and exciting tips with my readers. These will include putting your perishable items in the fridge, putting canned goods in the kitchen cabinets and keeping toilet paper in the bathroom cabinet. This is all part of my goal to have a self-cleaning house. These are invaluable tips that come from my own brilliant mind and I know you’ll be so grateful that I am sharing them with you.

Family Time

We will have more family time since I will not be on the computer twenty hours a day deleting comments and fighting the evil cronies. I will be able to notice that Bobby now likes to lick the lead paint walls, that Daniel only walks in circles and remember that Thomas exists. I will remember to feed them periodically and perhaps get their names straight. Hopefully, we can put Thomas in a Rubbermaid bin every now and then so Dna and I can make the next child. It’s hard to get some good lovin’ when the baby is in the bed; we keep rolling over on top of him but then he cries so we know we’re smushing him.

Travel

We can indulge our love of travel and do more of it as a family. We can load Therese, Cassie and Brad in the car with the children and travel to the Dollar Tree for a fun field trip. While there I can purchase more lights for the desk light in the bathroom and some tube meat which I will turn into sausage but putting pepper in it. This is our preferred means of vacation.

Gardening

I will incorporate new gardening techniques by growing mold on Brad and harvesting it to add to my floor cheese for a great nutritional punch. I will sprout weeds in the kitchen garden that we will add to our three spring onions for a light salad. I will learn about how I can sprout birdseed until it has a tail in order to add nutrition to my family’s diet. We will continue with our lettuce cans, our kefir and add to our gallons of whey.

More importantly, I will keep writing as my genius at writing blog posts must be expressed. Then I will have a whole lot of posts to enter into my new blog and keep my faithful readers happy. I know that you’ll miss me and my incredible tips. I only hope you can keep your homes together until I get back.

Please keep us in your prayers during this difficult time. This is probably the worst time in my life, even worse than when my child (don’t remember which one) fell into a coma. I will still fight the evil that comes by way as only Satan could turn someone’s heart against me and my family.

Love,
Emily

43 comments:

  1. Does the title *Emily's Belly Button* gross anyone else out? I mean, we've seen the apartment. I'm about to puke from the visual of what's lacto-fermenting in her belly button.

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  2. On Facebook, Emily says:

    *I think in a week or two I'll undelete it and leave it as is. I saved the posts, but many of the comments sections were a great resourcee, too. I'll announce when I do it on the other blog. I just need a rest from it for a while first.*

    Personally, I think she'll stick a non-controversial post up twice a week, so that she can keep her BlogHer ads. (Recipes, more crafts you can make out of black cloth...) Over time, it will morph into the same blog as it recently was.

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  3. She is a douche canoe.

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  4. Yes, the name Emily's Belly Button grosses me out too. Yuck.

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  5. Giz - where did you buy the $40 crib mattress from? I'm thinking of buying one for my dogs - they destroy dog beds, but they might not tear up a mattress if I build a base around it.

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  6. I used to make 'Gloodle Pie' and it was so good. Of course, I used lean ground-in-store beef and my evil oven to bake it!
    Why not grow weeds on the window sill? Yummy dandelion leaf salad. Salsify, the oyster plant, is very good in an 'oyster' stew. One Himalayan blackberry plant will produce enough fruit for several meals. But, you must train it up right and up-right to do so.
    See, Emily just needs to alter her lifestyle minimumly and see would be mainstream

    Susan
    http://susan-chicdaisy.blogspot.com/

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  7. Giz - I presume that you had the mattress shipped directly to her? Something seems fishy. I checked out the mattress on Overstock, and that's actually a "compact crib mattress". Meaning that it's smaller than a traditional crib. I could be wrong, but I never got the impression that the crib in the boys room was a compact crib. HOWEVER - the compact mattress is the exact dimensions for a Pack N Play. It's enough of a size difference that if you were to actually look at the item in person, you would immediately notice the smaller size. Sooooo is she lying about accepting the package? Or is she lying about selling it on Craigslist? Or maybe she's lying about putting the baby in a Pack N Play, because obviously this mattress is meant for a pack n play so her excuse for not keeping it would be a lie. Oh, just too many lies.

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  8. Okay, so I think Emily's site was pretty... sad. I was sad for her and her kids. But in reality, they're all happy. I look at her blog as an opportunity to view another perspective on how to live life.

    She invited us in. We were not forced to read it and follow along.

    And though I am a drama-addict, I think this site is pushing things too far. How is mocking her not a form of cyber-bullying? How is this site really helping?

    All I see this site doing is causing someone mental anguish and stress. Sure, she brought it on herself, but that doesn’t make it okay. I really think we should stop and think about how our words/actions are impacting an entire family. It needs to stop!

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  9. Bebby, our words and actions are not harming those poor kids. Everyone, or at least, most people on here are genuinely concerned for those children.

    Plus, when you start a blog - it's public. It is like walking down the street and telling strangers about your day. If one of those strangers says 'fuck off, who cares?', it's ultimately becuase you CHOSE to put yourself out there like that - and how anyone could sit back and not say anything to that woman about the conditions her children are living in? It'd be like watching someone drown and not lifting a finger.

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  10. Anon 3:41pm. Oh, I didn't know anything about dimensions nor did I notice that it said compact crib mattress. I got stuck on organic crib mattress and didn't know enough (as I'm a barren spinster) to think anything about whether it would fit properly. Well, I may have messed up in sending her something she honestly could not use - oh, well, I still maintain my intentions were good. Hopefully, she'll get some money for it and be able to afford a decent sleeping system for her kids.

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  11. Oh no please, I didn't mean anything negative towards your gift. Regardless of how big or small it is, it was a VERY thoughtful thing to do and we all know she handled with utter disrespect.

    I was just trying to point out that she makes no sense. She probably doesn't even actually own a Pack N Play, like she claims. It just seems to me that it would be completely obvious upon opening the package, "Oh this is a PnP mattress, not a full sized crib mattress", and thus render her crappy excuse of getting rid of the boys' crib a big fat lie.

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  12. bebby must be from sweeping the cobwebs. All they do is complain about hteir childhoods and the level of snark.

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  13. I've been looking at Craigslist and so far no mattresses in Maine for sale. There was a nice crib never used in Biddeford but no organic mattress.

    What a tangled web we weave, when in order to deceive.

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  14. Anon 4:23pm - I didn't take offense. I felt a little foolish just because I was too ignorant to know anything about crib mattresses, etc. It does make me feel a bit better about her selling it but I didn't take offense at anything you wrote at all.

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  15. THANK YOU for this site. I have actually lost sleep worrying about those boys. The thought has crossed my mind that she makes half the stuff up for "clicks" but the pictures....they tell the story.

    I was wondering if anyone has kept copies of the pictures of the boys closet of horror and that death trap bathroom?

    on a lighter note some of the entries here left me laughing so hard i had tears in my eyes.

    as many have mentioned.....my dogs have better beds to sleep on.

    I feel so sorry for those boys and also Dna. poor bastard.

    Stacy

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  16. Actually Gizmola, you may have done her a favor then. I think she does use a Pack-n-play sometimes for the youngest, because I remember the discussion about how hard the bottom is and how it wasn't appropriate for a baby to use 24/7. So in this case that would give her an organic mattress for it, making it far more comfortable and safe to use for many months to come. So wouldn't have to kick #2 out of the crib so soon.

    Not that she'll use it though. (sigh)

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  17. Ali,

    Everything you said is correct. She, in the end, is responsible for everything that is put upon her. I 100% agree.

    I just think that some of the posts on this site cross that super fine line, and come across in a very childish, negative light. I don't see how making fun of someone helps the situation.

    Also, Anon 4:23 I had no idea about sweeping the cobwebs... thanks for sharing... I think.

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  18. What are gloodles?

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  19. I love how people throw around "cyber bullying" on this blog and on message boards like they know what it means.

    Mocking a blog where the mother puts is lying, neglectful, and allows her family to live in squalor purposely, and displays it for the world to see while she makes money off of the controversy is HARDLY cyber bullying. Cyber bullying does not equal parodying or criticizing, especially ADULTS.

    http://stopcyberbullying.org/

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  20. In case you don't want to click the link:

    What is cyberbullying, exactly?

    "Cyberbullying" is when a child, preteen or teen is tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, embarrassed or otherwise targeted by another child, preteen or teen using the Internet, interactive and digital technologies or mobile phones. It has to have a minor on both sides, or at least have been instigated by a minor against another minor. Once adults become involved, it is plain and simple cyber-harassment or cyberstalking. Adult cyber-harassment or cyberstalking is NEVER called cyberbullying.

    From: http://www.stopcyberbullying.org/what_is_cyberbullying_exactly.html

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  21. Folks, I hope you understand that Giz has a mental illness -- she's bipolar and on heavy duty antipsychotics. If you ever took the time to read her blog you would see she's one trouble women. This feeding freezy she created and you're all participating in is not doing her any good. She needs to pull the plug on this site.

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  22. This one is just ridiculous. She's moved to a different BLOG to get away from this kind of stupid stuff. Usually I'm all for snark and drama but deliberately harassing one person in particular goes into the "stalker" category. =/

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  23. Cyber-stalking! That sounds about right.

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  24. Anon 10:53pm. I'm not on heavy duty anti-psychotics. You're mistaken. Plus, I didn't start this blog. Again, you're mistaken. If mocking me for a chemical imbalance is your idea of getting to me you've very much failed.

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  25. Oh Emily, just stop. The last few comments are from you or Dna. We can tell by the sucky spelling and grammar you use.

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  26. Hi Emily and Dan...

    I hope with all my heart that the someone with some bite has come into your life. Someone who can force you to wash the bedding and clothing correctly, to provide your kids with sheets and blankets.
    That will force you to get rid of the rotten food and purchase fresh healthy choices. That will sign your prideful stupid asses up for WIC and food stamps and will force you to take those kids to the Dr and provide some parenting classes to you both.
    Your both fools, and your children are paying for your sins.
    SHAME ON YOU BOTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  27. I think I am going to start a site called Funders Belly Button-an adventure in making a mattress out of my belly button droppings and also using it as a yummy snack!!

    Do you think Dna is forcing her to share her belly button droppings like he forced her to blog?

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  28. Also Emily stop reading this blog and wash your son's pissed soaked mattress and get down on your hands and knees and scrub your nasty floor you fucking pig.

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  29. I'm wondering about the arrogance part. Clearly, Emily is choosing not to publish what I would imagine a truckload of comments over at cavelint. However, my guess is that most are probably kinder, just to get accepted. Why not just 'hide' comments if one doesn't intend on publishing them? And, with her pattern of being enraged and deleting; I am sensing narcissism. So far, I've not seen evidence of a *lovely couple*. Addiction is hard to break and for that, the girl does have my empathy. Playing mindgames on her readers, however, elicits no such feeling. I'm one of the followers there. Going to remove myself now. I'm too old for this crap. Gizmola: bi-polar is not a big thing. Why anyone thinks it is and that it deserves mention is uneducated, basically. Immaturity is a far worse condition, imo. It stunts more for human growth and is the most pitiful state for an adult to remain in. I don't know you, but your 'balance' is more even than many others I've read on the web. I've been around reading blogs and comments since 2005. You are someone I'd have coffee with (or tea, whichever!), not even just to discuss the present situation.

    I have a feeling many of us 'anon'(s) take that cloak covering because of frustration. Many realize the 'imbalance' of Emily and are desperate to be the bulb she finally turns on. Unfortunately, with what I've observed, due to her age, limited shared life pre and after Dan...we have a shallow, snippy, self-righteous woman. I personally believe she will do well financially. I also believe she is one who does not possess 'people' skills. I'm really serious. I have a sibling who is deficient in 'people' but an enormous success at earning and saving $. I think this is Emily. Unfortunately, this lack will do nothing to help her in blogging.

    As long as this couple are okay with their living choices that is their business. Bringing their choices in full view expecting mostly favorable response is unrealistic.

    Emily's immaturity is complicated because she became public. It is in being public she has forestalled growth personally. It is good she went to church and heard from the Lord. It is immature to share beyond that.

    Many, many, many (have I stressed the term 'many'?) bloggers fall into a narcissism trap unwittingly when they begin blogging. I know. I did. That's why I don't blog. Not judging; seeing the snare for what it can be. This snare doesn't exist for the very few. Think: The Pioneer Woman, for example. But it's only non-existent for "the very few" of which, our dear Emily, is not a part of.

    Gotta git going! Gizmola...I'm the anon that sent you Emily's address and you kindly responded to me. You are a genuine one. I'm glad, even if in this venue...to have gotten to know you, if only this superficially. ;o)

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  30. "I am a wife, a mom, a child of God, an analyst, a writer, a designer, a maid, a theologian, a washing machine, a psychologist, a chef, a blogger, a friend, a philosopher, a painter, a woman. This in no means is intended to be an exhaustive list." Y'know...this ditty in her profile shoulda been my first RED FLAG.

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  31. 'ello. I am La Femme. I am seksi. U may recognize me. I live in squalor but it is sexy. Like here, I have opened a page to honor Meesus Emily. And her zexy, filthy life.

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  32. Plenty of people have a chemical imbalance in their brain. Thank God for modern medicine that can help people with these sorts of problems! There are many different types of medications that can be used to treat bipolar disorder, and "heavy duty" anti-psychotics are rarely used. Yeesh.

    I suppose treating mental health conditions is just another scam from the medical community to make lots of money?

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  33. @FreeDnaandBooby:
    One link does not effective research make...

    "The practice of cyberbullying is not limited to children and, ***while the behavior is identified by the same definition in adults***, the distinction in age groups is referred to as cyberstalking or cyberharassment when perpetrated by adults toward adults, sometimes directed on the basis of sex. Common tactics used by cyberstalkers are to vandalize a search engine or encyclopedia, to threaten a victim's earnings, employment, reputation, or safety. A repeated pattern of such actions against a target by an adult constitutes cyberstalking."

    Just because someone doesn't use the technically correct terminology, doesn't mean the entire argument is invalid. Don't spout knowledge unless you know what you're talking about.

    ***emphasis mine

    @Anon 10:53 - I mean, EMILY: GET OFF THE COMPUTER. NOW. Let all of this go. "Give it to God" - isn't that what the Christians say? Pull the plug on your computer and go take care of your children. Please. They need a mother. Just remember this.....GOD KNOWS THE TRUTH. You can fool yourself and others all you want, but God knows the truth, Emily.

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  34. bebby must be from sweeping the cobwebs. All they do is complain about hteir childhoods and the level of snark.

    Not true. We swap recipes and talk about dress patterns too. We're cool like that.

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  35. I would be interested to know if anyone sees the mattress come up on Craigslist. If she doesn't post it though, I'm sure she would just make up some story as to who she gave it or sold it to or something. She is a compulsive liar, after all.

    I really wonder though, if she just planned on selling the mattress, why did she take it out of the box? Common sense says that if you're selling something, to just leave it in the damn box.

    I really think she might decide to keep the mattress, but is just trying to piss Giz off by saying she's getting rid of it. That's totally up Emily's alley.

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  36. oh gawd gag me, un-follow, un-follow! i cannot un-follow this stupid blog fast enough!!!!
    yes emily is stupid and i feel bad for her kids but im not going to start a whole blog about it!! i mean, you read her blog and write in your about it almost every day!! and its not even interesting or witty! its just as boring as hers! have you NOTHING better to do with your life????? if there was a blog about every bad mother- there would be no more room on the internet. gees, get me out of this pointless rambling blog!!!!

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  37. Gees, un-follow already!!!! No need for an exit interview!!!!! It's nice to see you agree with the majority of the posters here that Emily is indeed, a bad mother but we don't really care if you follow this blog or not!! Talk about an inflated sense of self worth!!! That's so Emily of you (:

    The next time you feel the need to beat a hasty retreat, if you feel desperate to get away from from somewhere on the internet, my suggestion is you simply leave, without leaving poorly punctuated commentary. When you want to be released from a blog, all you need to do is close the window or tab in your browser that displays the blog. Un-follow and cut your RSS feed. It's really simple!!!!! Un-following is much faster and much more efficient if you just do it instead of talking about it, when no one gives a flying fark if you follow this blog or not.

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  38. Anon 2:56
    "That's so Emily of you"
    AWESOME quote!

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  39. @ Anonymous 9:25: I didn't just look at one link. I posted the link from the major organization that attempts to stop cyberbullying. I have studied this in my college classes.

    Parodying and commenting about her public blog is still not harassment. I am sure some people have crossed the line, but since we are talking about this blog, it doesn't talk to her directly. Did you read all of what you posted, or did you just see the little sentence that said "adult!" and you thought, AHA! Even taking the definition to adults, it's still not harassment, cyberstalking, or bullying. Read the definition: . Common tactics used by cyberstalkers are to vandalize a search engine or encyclopedia, to threaten a victim's earnings, employment, reputation, or safety. A repeated pattern of such actions against a target by an adult constitutes cyberstalking." So exactly how is this blog doing that? You could argue that the earnings fits the letter of the definition, but it's not the spirit.

    Furthermore, I left the link so people could see that it was from a reputable source and not just some anonymous person on a blog. I thought we were all grown ups and that I didn't need to post 10 links. At least I cited my source.

    Parody is NOT cyber harassment or cyber bullying.

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  40. PS And what makes your source more superior than mine? After all, one source does not thorough research make!

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  41. Alright, Anon on March 1, 2010 at 10:53 PM:

    Bipolar and clinical depression (as well as other mental illnesses) are due in large part to an imbalance in the chemicals of the brain. Giz takes her medication and keeps her illness under control. If she were a diabetic and needed insulin to control her disease, would you point it out as a problem with character? It she had hemophilia in which she had to take blood clotters, etc., would you be pointing it out then?
    Mental illness is NOT, I repeat NOT, a personality flaw, it is a disease, hence the ILLNESS part after 'mental.' Your outdated notions regarding this topic is astounding and helps to add to the stigma of mental illness, which causes people afflicted with mental illnesses to not seek help until it's too late.
    As for her medication, she's actually on a low doses compared to some I've seen.
    Oh, and Emily, if this is you, pick up a damn book about it from the library (hey, it's FREEEEE!) instead of spewing incorrect factoids at people who intimately know about the ins and outs of what an the every day struggles of those with bipolar.
    Chances are, you know someone with a mental illness, you just don't know it because few people have the courage Gizmo has about telling her story of life with the disease and medication she is on, which HELPS other people and demystifies a seldom understood condition. She is offering hope and help to those who need it.

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